As I walked into my quiet time with God this week, the heaviness of the day that would come on Sunday felt like an elephant sitting on my chest. The day that we celebrate women as mothers, and a day to celebrate our own moms who carried us for months and brought us into this world, would be a reminder of losses in my life.
I lost my mother a little over a year ago. My own children are too small to go out on their own and purchase that special gift or those special flowers to remind me how grateful they are for the love they have from me. Why would this be so important? "How selfish," you may be thinking. As selfish as it sounds, it will remind me that I'm alone. This is a place I don't normally sit in, but this day would soon bring all those reminders to me.
Sure, I tackle things as a single parent, but I take immense pride in the power and strength of my God through me in it all.
As I sat quietly, I began to pray and cry. My prayers were not questions of 'why.' My prayers and tears were a moment of recognizing wounds that were opened up because of an anticipation of what I would 'feel' in the next few days.
I thought about the women in my life that would feel this pain as well. As tears fell, each one represented someone in my life that would be carrying a wound of loss in some way:
A loss of a child
A loss of never being able to carry a child
A loss by a decision to abort a child and the recovery that had to take place
A loss of their own mother
A loss of never feeling the love of a mother
I prayed for hearts to open and for Jesus to pour healing into all of these women.
As I sat quietly, I felt enormous peace as tears streamed down my face. Maybe it was from letting go of the hurt I felt and laying it down. Or maybe it was that I sat with the ONE who was listening completely, with no interruptions. He sat with me, no questions asked, and there was peace. This was peace that only came from a moment between a daughter and her Heavenly Father.
I know my God knew I would come to Him, and I felt the presence of peace as He filled those wounds with His healing hand. Then I thought and began to pray for Jesus to give me His heart so that I could see what I was missing. He gave me clarity. He reminded me of the gifts I had in front of me. I have two treasures in my life that I brought into this world and that carry a piece of me.
As I was reminded of this, I felt complete gratitude for these amazing little human beings that have been my saving grace more times than I could count. Mother's Day would be for them. A mother's love is unconditional, and this would be no different. This day would be for them to celebrate that God has given me the ability to be present in their lives, to be their voice, and to be their protector. This is a gift I will cherish until my last breath on this earth.
I've heard it said, "We teach our children to become independent of us as they grow and to become dependent on God."
Peace, a mother's peace, can only come from the One who sits beside her and provides the love and strength she needs every day. Through the exhaustion, the worry, and the constant care, let us hold true to the life God has chosen for us.
I pray you feel that peace today in whatever you are walking through, or whatever wounds will open up on this day. I pray you take a moment to sit with the One who will sit with you, uninterrupted, and who waits with a healing hand.
Happy Mother's Day.
Susanna Kozlow
A Word From the Divinely Driven Ministry Team:
"Mother's Day for me is a day where I pray for my mom, grandma, mother-in-law, and ancestors who were mothers - those who are and were the backbone of my family and myself. I draw wisdom from my motherly examples. Some of it comes from my mom and female family elders, as well as from women who have loved me and have led by example. I remember them all. I call and see them. I send cards or gifts. I share this holiday with them all, and I spend it with my husband and kids. I just keep the day simple for myself and make sure to thank and express my love to my mom, grandma, and all moms I know via social media or texts." -Jenny Racoma
"Mother’s Day brings the tension of wanting to honor and celebrate my mother and my mother-in-law, who have been tremendous gifts in my life, with a heaviness for myself and others who may easily feel set aside. There are so many reasons for women to feel set aside on this day. However, what we experience (or do not get to experience) in the physical realm is more than gifted to us by God in the spiritual realm. God tells His prophet Jeremiah in Jeremiah 1:5a, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart.” Dear one, if Mother’s Day is a difficult day for you, then this day and every day, be encouraged, for you are not set aside. You are set apart by God." -Jonie Buckley "I thank God for the spiritual children God has chosen to place in my life. I am a mom, not because I've given birth to flesh, but because I help nurture and give birth to dreams in others." -Sylvia Reynolds-Blakely "A mi mami…te amaré siempre! Día de las Madres no es lo mismo sin escuchar tu voz diciendo “mi hijita.” Han sido dos años que han pasado desde que partistes a morar con el Señor, y aún me hace falta tus palabras, el verte, la emoción que sentía cuando venías de visita en el verano. Me gustaba llevarte a la playa y mirar el atardecer juntas. Cada vez que estabas juntas recordábamos cuando era chiquita e íbamos en familia a la playa. Cuando íbamos al parte, te llevaba de la mano y podía sentir tu mano suave y el calor que siempre me dabas atravez de tu mano. Extraño tus palabras y consejos de tener paciencia con mis hijos o cuando diariamente me contabas las noticias diarias. Eras mi reportera favorita de Telemundo. Tuvisteis un corazón grande y fuistes de carácter fuerte, y siempre tuvisteis mi respeto y amor. Me gustaba visitar tus lugares de trabajo y tus amistades porque atravesé de ellas te aprendí a conocer y valorar más. Mami te extraño, pero le doy gracias a Dios por haber sido mi madre, a quien como dice la palabra honré.
Efesios 6:2-3 dice: Honra a tu padre y a tu madre, que es el primer mandamiento con promesa; para que te vaya bien, y seas de larga vida sobre la tierra.
Aunque todavía siento el dolor de tu partida, mi consuelo es que algún día te volveré a ver. Mi Padre Celestial es ahora quien cuida de mi y sé que estoy en buenas manos. Ahora como madre, quiero enseñar a mis hijos el respeto, amor, compasión, obediencia, sumisión que un día tú me enseñastes.
Si aún tienes a tu madre viva, disfruta cuidándola y amándola. Ellas son bendición en nuestras vidas y si no tienes una relación muy buena con ellas, no esperes que sea muy tarde para perdonar o pedir perdón. Dios les bendiga!" -Shirley Rosario
"To my Mom...I will always love you! Mother's Day is not the same without hearing your voice saying "my little daughter." It has been two years that have passed since you left to dwell with the Lord, and I still miss your words, seeing you, and the emotion I felt when you came to visit in the summer. I liked to take you to the beach and watch the sunset together. Every time we were together, we remembered when I was little and we went to the beach as a family. When we went to the park, I took you by the hand, and I could feel your soft hand and the warmth that you always gave me through your hand. I miss your words and advice to be patient with my children or when you told me the daily news. You were my favorite reporter on Telemundo. You had a big heart, you were a strong person, and I will always respect and love you. I liked to visit your places of work and your friends because through them I learned to know and value you more. Mommy, I miss you, but I thank God for you being my mother, whom, as the Word says, I honored.
Ephesians 6:2-3 says: Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise; so that it may go well with you, and you may live long on earth.
Although I still feel the grief of your loss, my hope is that one day I will see you again. My Heavenly Father is now the one who takes care of me, and I know that I am in good hands. As a mother, I want to teach my children the respect, love, compassion, obedience, and submission that you taught me.
If you still have your mother alive, enjoy taking care of her and loving her. They are a blessing in our lives, and if you don't have a very good relationship with her, don't wait until it's too late to forgive or ask for forgiveness. God bless you all!" -Shirley Rosario
"Today, whether you have children or are like a mother to others, Happy Mother’s Day Beautiful Woman of God! You are loved and appreciated more than you can fathom! “The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17 -Silvana Place
"I have so much love for my mom, and I am so grateful for her in more ways than I would ever be able to express. 1 Peter 3:4 is one of many scripture verses that speak of the beauty of her love and what a wonderful mother she is: Rather, true beauty is the secret beauty of the heart, of a sincere, gentle and quiet spirit. That is very precious to God." -Krista Steuber
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